We all face adversities in our lives. Stress, trauma, tragedy, health problems, and significant changes in our lives, are all difficult to experience. However, there is one quality the majority of people share to a greater or lesser extent and that is – resilience.
Resilience is the ability to move through adversaries and rise from them. It is a set of skills and psychological traits that allows us to cope with struggles and recover from them.
Research shows that people, in general, are more resilient than you might think. The majority of people can utilize their inner and outer resources to recover from failure or unfortunate events. However, some people need significantly less time to do so.
What Resilient People Do Differently?
People with higher levels of resiliency, on the other hand, approach the situation with a positive attitude and the ability to regulate their emotions. This allows them to be more objective in observing what is going on and how to overcome the situation or at least reduce the damage. Additionally, this helps them move forward without dwelling on the negative outcomes for too long, and positively reframe the situation.
Fortunately, scientists also found that resilience is something that can be built. Certain skills are trainable and that can increase resilience significantly, such as self-compassion, confidence in your strengths and abilities, problem-solving skills, and emotion management.
Here are three things resilient people are able to do that allows them to bounce back from difficult experiences more quickly and effectively, that you can start cultivating more as well:
They can reframe their narrative
When something bad happens, there is not only one way to interpret it. We can choose how we explain the meaning and consequences of events. Highly resilient people can reframe difficult situations, at least to some degree, to their advantage. They can see setbacks as a form of helpful feedback, the opportunity to learn, or as something that, in the end, leads them to a good path.
They use social support
Resilient people usually don’t act “tough” or like they can cope with everything alone. They lean on their support system and let the people who care about them be there for them. Good relationships are crucial for recovery because they can provide different kinds of support, from emotional to practical.
They practice self-compassion
Being resilient doesn’t mean you have to pretend that you feel okay about the disappointments and failures. It doesn’t mean that you should suffocate your true emotions and put on a happy face. Instead, resilience is kind of the opposite. It’s the ability to accept your unpleasant emotions about the situation without judging yourself harshly. It is about offering yourself some love and kindness while learning from the experience.
All this, of course, does not mean that resilient people don’t feel painful emotions or that they don’t face their feelings, hiding behind positivity. Resiliency means healthy coping, which suggests that it demands emotions to be felt and accepted before taking action toward recovery.
How easy/hard is it for you to bounce back from a setback?
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Sources:
https://www.apa.org/topics/resilience